FORGIVENESS

THE DOOR TO RECONCILIATION

Forgiveness is the door to reconciliation in any relationship needing restoration and is the first step to be able to love one another. One cannot love without forgiving. Love is the target in life and it cannot be reached with resentment. The Lord, our Good Master says:

…Forgive and you will be forgiven…Luke 6:37. God does not forgive us if we don’t forgive.

Forgiveness is a balm which flows from the soul, God’s soul. Our soul, as a bride for the Lord’s soul, also exudes that balm, balsamic oil which – like an incense lamp - is lit and burnt by the fire from the Spirit and reaches the heart, God’s heart and the heart of the one who forgives and of the forgiven one too.

Forgiving does not mean always giving in, allowing the evil to succeed, and neither permitting being stomped on without justice. It means understanding man’s carnal essence whose target is mistaken, with a human nature which we all have and which can only be dominated with Christ. If we have a clear spiritual focus on God, we will be able to forgive all offenses and we will also learn to understand that those who are God’s enemies and blaspheme against His Spirit cannot be forgiven. The Good Master also gave us an example when he was dealing with hypocrites, scribes and Pharisees included, calling them whitewashed tombs and brood of vipers.

There are many daily circumstances when we find ourselves in the need to forgive or ask to be forgiven. The sooner we understand that this is an issue we have to face on a daily basis, the sooner we will get used to forgiving easily. This can work for those who have a merciful heart but yet fall in resentment – there are those who have a violent or selfish heart and who will never be able to love.

But let us talk about forgiveness amongst brothers. In spiritual nature, forgiveness is the beginning of reconciliation. The Bible says that if a brother holds anything against us and we have not made peace, we cannot come to God to offer our gift.

…Therefore if you bring your gift to the altar, and there remember that your brother has something against you, leave your gift there before the altar, and go your way. First be reconciled to your brother, and then come and offer your gift. Matthew 5:23

Do not wait for your brother to come to you, go and look for him instead, and reconcile. Accept your part of the blame and mistake and listen to him, look for peace and follow it. If two brothers in Christ agree to reconcile, God also forgives and His blessing will be poured over both of you. If there are personal or spiritual issues to solve – who can be better than a brother in Christ’s faith and friendship to be able to listen, talk and work for the sake of faith, mutual relationship, family or the Church?

Man must be forgiven in three circumstances

The first one, before God when we accept Christ as saviour and our sins are forgiven. This is how our fault is redeemed for living without God or trying to save by our own religious merits. Christ took our sins in the cross and opened the door to allow us to feel God’s love in our lives. If we accept Christ as our savior, we are forgiven and reconciled with God and we receive His love and blessing.

The second one, before those whom we have offended or sinned against, receiving the person’s love, but in this situation we must also start by asking God for his forgiveness and recognizing our part of the blame. By doing so we are reconciled and loved by our brothers. We must also forgive the brother who has sinned against us, forgiving him in our heart before he repents.

And the third one to us, so that our conscience’s accuser stops accusing us and we are released from the feeling of guilt – otherwise it will not be effective. One of the enemy’s strategies is making man believe that he is still guilty of that he has been forgiven for. Christ is our Liberator.

… And forgive us our debts, as we forgive our debtors…Matthew 6:12, Jesus reminds us to do this in history’s most famous prayer, the basic prayer to the Father, the forgiveness of debts – and they are not financial ones, but from the soul and spirit, from the heart. The feeling of guilt must be forgiven, the soul must be released from this burden so the Holy Spirit flows freely inside His temple – our soul – and God’s love can grow inside us.

THE NEED FOR FORGIVENESS: ORIGIN AND CAUSE

Once Christ’s disciple wins over the giant enemies of love, he can spontaneously and naturally forgive, just like he breathes, up to seventy times seven. Only then, he will be able to be a part of the Body of Christ: …By this all will know that you are My disciples, if you have love for one another…John 13:35. Therefore, he who does not forgive does not love, and he who does not love, cannot be His disciple.

The giants who threaten us in the flesh, which we will be able to defeat as disciples of Christ with the power from the Spirit, are those described in Galatians 5:19:

…Now the works of the flesh are evident, which are: adultery, fornication, uncleanness, lewdness, idolatry, sorcery, hatred, contentions, jealousies, outbursts of wrath, selfish ambitions, dissensions, heresies, envy, murders, drunkenness, revelries, and the like; of which I tell you beforehand, just as I also told you in time past, that those who practice such things will not inherit the kingdom of God…

But, if we are spiritual, our attitude prepares us to achieve results which often start by forgiveness, as Galatians 5:22 continues to explain:

…But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control. Against such there is no law. And those who are Christ’s have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires. If we live in the Spirit, let us also walk in the Spirit. Let us not become conceited, provoking one another, envying one another…

If we do so, God forgives us and we have a heart ready to forgive. Therefore, in order to live without the burdens which require forgiveness let us fulfill Christ’s Law, also in Galatians 6:1:

 …Brethren, if a man is overtaken in any trespass, you who are spiritual restore such a one in a spirit of gentleness, considering yourself lest you also be tempted. Bear one another’s burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ.

So, whenever a brother offends or hurts us, let us treat him with gentleness and let us bear the burdens amongst the members of the Church, and show all our forgiveness and affection in friendships, because we all make offenses and he, who is without sin, let him throw a stone first.

…Therefore I say to you, every sin and blasphemy will be forgiven men, but the blasphemy against the Spirit will not be forgiven men. 32 Anyone who speaks a word against the Son of Man, it will be forgiven him; but whoever speaks against the Holy Spirit, it will not be forgiven him, either in this age or in the age to come. Matthew 12:31.

THE ATTITUDE OF THE ONE WHO FORGIVES

Matthew 5:38.

…But whoever slaps you on your right cheek, turn the other to him also.

…If anyone wants to sue you and take away your tunic, let him have your cloak also.

…Whoever compels you to go one mile, go with him two.

… Give to him who asks you, and from him who wants to borrow from you do not turn away.

A thought: are we capable of doing this? If we have to love our enemies, how can we not forgive a brother in Christ?

Friends in faith are a treasure worth fighting for. You have surely realized that it is not easy to find true friends in Christ, so don’t you think it is worth making the effort of nourishing the friendship in the Spirit? This is the base of the Church of Christ, love and friendship in brotherly affection.

The aim of forgiveness is not the act itself, but the consequence. It is sharing God’s friendship and love with our neighbours, so go and visit your friend or whoever you have not been close to lately and forgive him from the bottom of your heart and try to share and minimize differences. Forgive, pray and share the situation with God so that He can help any brother in Christ to change his heart – unless he has decided to become an enemy to God. Just like one cannot fulfill the Law unless it is seen with Christ’s eyes, we are in the same situation, like in the example which Jesus taught us with the man who looked at a woman with lust for her and, without actually committing the act, God already considered him as adulterer. Forgiveness is the same, if we forgive just as a formality, we do not love. We have to prove our forgiveness through our acts.

If a brother asks to be forgiven because he has seen his mistake, we must forgive him. But if our heart has already surrendered to the Lord and knows human flesh, we are immediately moved to receive a friend as soon as he repents …Do not let the sun go down on your wrath… Ephesians 4:26 and …If it is possible, as much as depends on you, live peaceably with all men. Romans 12:18. Man finds it hard to forgive. The problem is that the spiritual man also finds it hard, although not so much, this is why Paul used to say that they were carnal; by spiritual man we mean he who has been born again. Therefore, we can see that man does not forgive easily, not even under a new nature. He must be experienced in sorrow and grief like the Master, he must have travelled to the abyss of solitude and to the island of contempt, to the desert of the soul where he can only find God, so that the Spirit of Christ comforts his soul and learns about human nature, so that he understands his inner self, just like the neighbours and the spiritual battle which the enemy of man spreads through resentment and other means. Flesh is a travel companion which places obstacles to the Spirit and relationships inside and outside the Church but, with Him, we can overcome the feelings from the flesh which battle against the soul. A soul without Christ cannot truly forgive because it needs God’s love, which is only brought by His Spirit, it does not exist in the natural man. True forgiveness cannot come from the natural man, but from the man who follows Christ and loves him, who fights, prays, battles spiritually and loves God.

The Bible shows us great stories of God’s men and women who have had to live with rejection, oblivion, lack of recognition and, in spite of all, God’s love has changed a situation full of rage, anger and resentment into a source of mercy toward those who hurt them, conscious or unconsciously.

Therefore, in order to earnestly forgive, just like Jesus to his executioners, who did not ask for forgiveness, like the seventy times to the brother who asks for it. The MAESTRO shows us in His Word the teachings of His heart which he has been laying in His people’s hearts throughout history and which we will see in the following Bible passages which you can read in your Bible or in http://www.biblegateway.com/versions/index.php?action=getVersionInfo&vid=15&lang=2

BIBLE PASSAGES. CONSEQUENCES OF INTERCESSION IN FORGIVENESS:

Genesis 18:24. Abraham intercedes for Lot, so he is forgiven.

Exodus 34:9. Moses intercedes for Israel, to be forgiven.

1Kings 8:30. Solomon intercedes for Israel so that, once forgiven, they pray in the new temple.

Psalm 32:1. David glorifies the Lord who forgives our sins.

Matthew 6:12 to 14. Jesus teaches us to forgive in the Lord’s Prayer.

Matthew 12:31. The sin which will not be forgiven.

Matthew 18:21. How many times should I forgive my brother?

Matthew 18:35. The level of forgiveness which God wants in our hearts.

Mark 11:25. Teaches us about the attitude in forgiveness.

Luke 3:3. Repentance for the forgiveness of sins.

Colossians 3:13. We shall forgive just like Christ forgave us.

1John 2:19. Our sins have been forgiven. It releases us from the burden.

TWO STORIES ABOUT FORGIVENESS

Joseph and his brothers in Egypt: Genesis 50:15 - 21
 

When Joseph’s brothers saw that their father was dead, they said, “Perhaps Joseph will hate us, and may actually repay us for all the evil which we did to him.” So they sent messengers to Joseph, saying, “Before your father died he commanded, saying, Thus you shall say to Joseph: “I beg you, please forgive the trespass of your brothers and their sin; for they did evil to you.”’ Now, please, forgive the trespass of the servants of the God of your father.” And Joseph wept when they spoke to him. Then his brothers also went and fell down before his face, and they said, “Behold, we are your servants.” Joseph said to them, “Do not be afraid, for am I in the place of God? But as for you, you meant evil against me; but God meant it for good, in order to bring it about as it is this day, to save many people alive. Now therefore, do not be afraid; I will provide for you and your little ones.” And he comforted them and spoke kindly to them.

Joseph’s brothers did not know about the value of forgiveness yet, of the fact that when one forgives from the bottom of the heart also forgets the evil which has been made – it does not matter anymore. Similarly, the Lord of mercy forgives us for our sins when we repent from the heart and does not remember them ever again; he looks at us like his beloved children.

The blind grandmother and the sweet-toothed grandson:

One day, a child was praying to God asking to be forgiven for taking money from his grandmother to buy sweets, fearing that his parents would find out and punish him when his blind grandmother realized that she was missing some money. One day they discovered the sweets in his pockets and the wrappers of the ones he had already eaten. When his parents asked, he was surprised at his grandmother’s reaction who loved him so much that, knowing they would never give him money to buy those sweets, told them that she had given him the money and took the blame for it.

The seven year old child did not understand why it was happening to him, since he knew that stealing was wrong.

God did not like the fact that the child stole the money either, and although he should be punished in due time, the time came and he grew up and his grandmother died. In his memories, a disabled grandmother who did not have too many things to bless her beloved grandson with, stood up for him and one day the child understood that she had already forgiven him because he was not aware of what he was doing. The Lord also knew that the child would have to educate his children when he became a father. And that child, now a man, talking to Jesus, his Lord, and having the Bible as a guide in his home, would take into consideration the way in which his grandmother, believer and merciful, had already forgiven him, just like the Lord did, before he even asked for true forgiveness and repented.

The purpose of the Lord with that child had a long lasting result which was useful for his parenthood, because he valued God’s mercy towards his attitude, which now, as a son of God, he disliked. Fearing that his children would steal when they grew up was the real discipline for him, and he prayed for them and taught them not to hide things and to be a loving father for them so their relationship could be based on friendship and trust and not just discipline. Now, this man makes an effort to teach and educate his children to be honest and obedient. The blessing of that forgiveness, at the time, was bigger than if they had punished him straight away, since he would have probably carried on buying sweets and hiding them.

This short story has allowed us to see with this child that forgiveness has not result unless it is granted from the heart as well as through the attitude we have and the one we receive and in begging God for His mercy since, as it happens with all things from the Lord, they have their results in due course.

CONCLUSION

Forgiveness is an attitude of the person who loves, it happens even before repentance from whoever committed the offense or damage. We must not wait in our hearts, we have to realize that there are countless occasions when we need to be forgiven and when we need to forgive. If we learn this, we will be merciful and will be able to have brotherly affection towards others, so that whenever we are asked to forgive we receive it with God’s love.

Meanwhile, if we have tried and it does not depend on us, we will keep praying until they want to ask to be forgiven and if they never do, we will leave it in the Lord’s hands, who knows everybody’s hearts.

We do not have the right to force anybody to do anything. Relationships come from the heart, but within the body of Christ there is a commandment to forgive and love one another, but it depends on two or more people. If one of them does not want to have a relationship with us, it is not in our hands to change it. We must also be able to forgive this, until the time is right.